Some kids don't like to share. Maybe being selfish is natural, and they have to unlearn it. I don't know. But I do know that there are many reasons why kids may not want to share.
- It is a special toy. It doesn't have to actually be a special toy, for it to feel like a special toy to a kid. Big G got a set of cars for Christmas that came in a divided cardboard package. he carried his cars around in that for days. I wanted to throw it away, the other kids wanted to play with it, but the answer was always "No."
- They want to take care of it. I remember my older brother was always very careful with his books, he would let me read them, but not our younger brother. My mom thought he was just being mean, until BigBro explained that he didn't like that Little Bro folded down the corners of his books, instead of using a book mark.
- They don't want to. Yes, this can be personal. I don't think I would share anything with someone who was mean to me either.
- They are defensive. If they are always being forced to give up things when they don't want to, some kids may become more resistant to sharing in the future.
- They just remembered they had it. Sometimes when they are asked about it, it reminds them that they had it, which may make them want it. Even if they were playing with something else before.
- They don't know how. Some kids may worry that they won't get it back, or that they aren't allowed to play anymore. Showing them by example may be a great way to ease their worries about their toys.
To me, these are perfectly good reasons for not wanting to share. The trick then, as a Mom (or Dad) is to teach our kids to want to share, despite all of these reasons.